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Personal Revelation

March 15, 2011

One needs two chocolate kisses prior to any Ab workout  (to increase the glycemic index of course)

Hey!  I had two hardboiled egg whites after my workout at 4:40opm!  It was breakfast time.  (Did I mention I am working Nights?) 

You are a great deducer!  I had chocolate before breakfast.

Commentary and quotes from the Bachelor…

  • Chad is WAY hotter than Brad.  (Chad is Brad the Bachelor’s married twin brother).
  • Chantal: “We’ve been living in LaLa land. I get that”.  Finally someone that acknowledges this is rigged!
  • ” He’s her angel” (sniff sniff). Said by Pam (Brad’s mother) while commenting about what Emily said about Brad after she told her story to sway them .  You know she was not engaged to Ricky Bobby at the time of his death.  She was a pregnant girlfriend.  Trashy celebrity magazines said so!  So it must be true.
  • Brad’s brother: ” You realize this means you have to get the house and the whole picket fence”.  Brad: “Gulp”.
  • I broke down and ate M&Ms at this point!  (M&M’s that I had hidden far away in a  secret place).  It only took me 2 and 1/2 hours to find them.  Or give in to them.
  • One of Brad’s SIL (sisters in law):  ” When you’re a Mom, you just get it” .  No offense to anyone that isn’t a Mom.  JUST MOST CHICKS THAT WATCH THE SHOW!!!!
  • Brad: “We are going to do something different from sightseeing!” I am going to feed you to the Sharks MUHAHAHAH!  (especially since you’ve gained a few while on the show).  Said to Chantal while going on a boat and in a cage and in wetsuits about to be dropped in the ocean off of the African coast.
  • Chantal: “OH NO!!!  Brad: “Oh yeh!  Oh yeh! Oh yeh!”  That was just funny people.  He said it three times.
  • Brad: ” What a great way to test out the water together!” Cliche cliche
  • Brad: ” We are in it together”.  Duh! What? The water or the relationship? He is the man of cliche’s
  • Chantal:  “I travelled the world for Brad”.  Yeh, it was SO hard, having all expense paid trips and exotic vacations, helicopter rides, delicious food and luxurious hotel rooms. Boo fricking hoo
  • Chantal: “Yeay! (clap clap like a two year old)  ” I made myself cry”.  Said while Brad opened her ‘message in a bottle’ gift of a map of all the places they’ve been together and a love note. I’m not kidding she actually did and said that.
  • Is Emily really wearing a Man’s shirt with a belt around it.  Is that a dress?
  • Oh My Gosh.  Why is Emily talking about having a kid around is the end of the world.  “There is no more watching football and drinking a beer on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon”.  Hey if that was the case, I wouldn’t have had a kid!  Thank goodness my kid likes football.  She going to be a little Lyndi when she grows up.
  • I want to go to Africa but I am afraid of pirates.
  • A ring that means Bradley? did I hear that right? What does that mean?  I know nothing about jewellry.
  • Tye-dye?  Emily really? Did you forget to take your personal assistant with you to Africa.  Man, the Bachelor industry must be cutting back.  This IS a recession!
  • Chantal really needs to meet Tracy Anderson.  Or she needs to learn about Spanx.
  • Wait? Did he say ORA? Or aura? His Texan accent is killing me.  I can’t understand him.
  • Oh no! He chose Emily!  Chantal was the first out of the limo.  The first girl is always the one to go!  I can’t believe 11 seasons of experience and I made the wrong call.
  • Did he really just say “Give me your forever”.  What does that mean?
  • UGH! Brad and Emily are going to be such a BORING and well-mannered Southern couple sitting on their porch on their ranch in their rocking chairs.  I want that. 
  • He is putting his Bradley ring on her finger.  And there is a RJH band on her wrist!!!!  WHAT!  What is that you ask?  Her ex-boyfriends initials.  That is lame. 
  • Do people still wear one strap dresses?  Chantal has worn two tonight. 
  • Chantal cries too much.
  • Brad is clueless…he didn’t even know she was crying.
  • WHYis she crying.  She has a new boyfriend.
  • That is the worst commercial I have ever seen.  Cat food proposal!  Have you seen it?  Do they have to be so blatant about who their target audience is?

Dave commentary: 

  • What chance are you giving to Brad and Chris Harrison professing their undying love to each other tonight?
  • How much has his (Brad’s) Mom had to drink?
  • Is he wearing a cowboy shirt?
  • Well, with her Navajo earrings, they are the perfect fit.
  • Did she name her daughter before or after RickyBobby the movie (talking about whether Emily naming her kid after her dead boyfriend the NASCAR guy ala Talladega Nights with Will Ferrell as RickyBobby).
  • Wow, he has been the Bachelor twice and still has no testicles.  (About Brad asking a billion times if Chantal (rejected girl) was alright and if she had anything to say).
  • Me : “You should take notes” (about his proposal to Emily)
  • Dave: “On what?  Not having testicles?  Because I could loan him one”
  • Me “Shoot! I could” (on helping Brad decide who to pick)
  • Dave ” Whoa!”
  • Me “Whoa.  I mean I could help him decide.  Not testicles”

I could go on!

But there are two doughnuts left on the table.

Things have come in two’s tonight. 

Two chocolate kisses.

Two hardboiled eggs.

Two admits.

I think it is personal revelation.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. Sheree permalink
    March 17, 2011 2:30 am

    I’ll be the first to comment! I’m going to have Tom read this when he gets back from walking the dog. I’m still sooooooo mad that I had to watch this by myself in a hotel room because I was on a business trip. I was only a half hour away from you Coleen!!! Anyway, my thoughts exactly about the whole thing except I picked “Em” and I was right. What were they feeding Chantel?? Lots of chocolate kisses and booze I think. Are we the only people that watch this?? Meaning me, you and our husbands (they REALLY do enjoy it I think). Tom totally called it about “Ash” being the next one. That is why she had the makeover…Love ya!

  2. Tom permalink
    March 17, 2011 2:46 am

    Yeah, like I watch the bachelor.

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